One Long Overdued Testimonial

They say "love" is one hard concept to put into words. Frankly, I find defining "friendship" to be a more daunting task. To begin with, no two friends ever mean the same, and to top it up, you never really know how it begins, and sometimes unfortunately, how it ends.

I generally have a hard time keeping track of how I became friends with the closest people in my life. Quite a few of them I have known practically all my life, and the rest just became important over time. I don't really remember when I first met them or how we connected.

But this one friend, to whom this post is dedicated, is pretty unique because not only do I know the first time we spoke, the event is documented by national newspapers.

And God knows its beyond time that I wrote something for him. So, here goes my testimonial to one of the most important person in my life. (That's right, we knew each other way back during the Orkut days.)

This cute pic was forwards to me by, (yeah, you guessed it), the queen of cuteness, Bhaggu. And with the mindset that this friendship is going to last a lifetime, this is my attempt to highlight how it all began (read as, lasted the first seven years).

BEFORE THE ACTUAL BEGINNING (Pre- 2007 Era)

Ever since you arrived at our school, your name was a regular feature in all the morning assemblies where any academic awards were given. So, for the first few years, I had no face to associate with the name. All I knew was that Abhinav Kishore is a genius and way out of my league.

THE BEGINNING OF A BEAUTIFUL FRIENDSHIP  (Last line of Casablanca)

The only good thing about my +2 were the people I met and the friends I made. And even though I didn't know at that time, looking back I can see how the cornerstone of this friendship was laid. It started with silly games being played at the backbenches, talking endlessly during the computer practicals and finally getting caught passing chits during the tutorials.

HALF A DECADE OF DISTANCE  (That Supposedly Makes the Heart Grow Fonder)

And then we went our separate ways. You went off to Guwahati and I to Calcutta, and a part of me thought that was it. We would end up like all the others, chatting online and phone calls that would eventually be restricted to thrice a year (birthdays and new year) and never ever meeting again.
Boy! Was I wrong!
Because we met, and a lot at that, at railway stations, and lanes of Camac Street searching for test centers, and Xrong's Place and Park Street and Avani Riverside Mall and South City and being too full to even finish a cup of tea at New Market.

AN ALL KINDS OF FRIEND

I had read this article a long time ago, and I find myself pretty blessed to find an all-in-one friend like you.
So, just have a look at the article here (for the first five types) and I will clarify why you fit all the categories in this section.

1. "How did you actually get to be my friend" friend
Well, as I had mentioned right at the very beginning, you and I do not belong in the same league. You get almost perfect GRE scores, I am a five point someone. (This would be the first and the last time I reference Chetan Bhagat, I swear.) Our friendship is a mystery to me,but am I glad that we are what we are today!

2. The Partier Friend
Pretty much all my friends are "Partiers" since I am almost a hermit most of the time. So, this category is a given. Moving on.

3 &4. The One-Upper Friend and The "Oh my god, you are so much cooler than me" Friend
Let's see. IIT, summer abroad, month long USA trip. I think you get the drift here.

5. The Sweetest Guy In the World
Since guys do not like being called sweet on principle, I have an exhibit here to prove my point. Not only are you the sweetest, you are all charms when you want to be.

See what I mean?

6. The 4am Friend
You and I both value the importance of 4am and here is exhibit#2 to drive home my point.

I have been working at this piece for months now. I had couple of rough drafts too. And I can't think of anything else to write.
It has been an incredible 7 years. You have been an incredible friend. And I consider myself fortunate to call you my friend. I know I can be difficult sometimes, and I can't thank you enough for never being mad at me when I am being silly.
I will wrap this up with the last pic of us taken together. And I hope we get to take new pics soon.

Of Department Store Epiphanies

Last week, by an out-of-the-spur decision, a couple of my friends and I decided to visit the nearby shopping complex. After chilling at the local dunkin’ donut outlet, we decided to hit the department store having nothing better to do, and I realized I still don’t know so much about myself.

Up until this point, I was a firm believer that I wasn’t the sentimental type when it came to my home cuisine.  I never look for Bengali food when I went out to eat, and always want to try out new dishes. But this day, I saw a yogurt cup with “misti doi” flavor and despite knowing it wasn’t the real deal, and only advertising technique meant for gullible Bengalis, I ended up buying not one but two of those. 

  

I kept wondering why did I buy it, because it really didn’t make any sense for me to buy, and yet, I couldn’t walk away without putting it in my cart. And in the billing counter it finally hit me.

I bought it for the sentimental value. I bought it because it reminded me of Sunday lunches with my parents and trips to sweet shops with my grandfather. It reminded me of home. And some part of me will always be homesick. Not enough to make academic and professional decisions based on a need to be close to home, but just enough to pick up random grocery items that remind of home, and not being able to forget it for days, and write blog posts about it.

If we were all the same, how dull would life be!

It started like a normal Wednesday for me. I was up till 2 am yesterday night, woke up at 8 am to attend the 8:30 lecture, got done with classes and checking notifications on Facebook, when I realized I needed to give words to all the thoughts that have been swirling around in my mind even since 9 am today morning when my Macroeconomics teacher, while describing monetary and fiscal policies claimed, "I am not who I was a day ago. None of you are like me, well, atleast I hope not. How dull would life be if that were the case!". And it made me think of changes. Changes in places, changes in people, changes all around.

It used to bug me when I found people changing. Frankly, it still does. I have a hard time accepting change. That actually is something I won't mind changing in me at all.

I lived in Calcutta as an undergraduate student. I never wanted to go to Calcutta in the first place, but with time I started loving the city. I think it will take a lot for me to stop loving Calcutta. But I went to Park Street on New Year's Day this year. I think I was visiting the place after 8-9 months and I found the changes. I saw a new French eatery Au Bon Pain right at the spot where Music World used to be. My friend and I, infact had breakfast at Au Bon Pain that day, and were trying to remember the old place. I was thinking of the number of times one of us would wait for the other in front of Music World, if someone was running late. I remembered all the times we would go to Music World to just look at the music collection with no intention of buying anything with my friends. And I missed it. I know I missed it because I am thinking (and writing) about it. But I got over it. I did not hate Au Bon Pain. I won't like Park Street any less because Music World closed down.

Unfortunately, accepting changes in people isn't so easy for me. I put in a lot of effort on people and relations, and when someone just changes without any reason, I find it hard to deal with. I consider the concept of 'drifting apart' a load of crock.

I am listening to "A Thousand Years" by Christina Perri as I write and I am thinking of the amount of synchronization it will take for two people to change in the same way to love each other for a thousand years. You would say love matures and love changes. The whole five phase shenanigan. But just stop and think about the amount of unhappiness you see around you. And, as I started thinking today, I got more and more inclined to believe that it is all because we change, and we change in a way that we stop being important to the other person, or stop caring for them, whatever be the case.

This, in turn makes me realize how precious those friendships or relationships are that I could sustain for all these years. I have a couple of friends who I have known and loved for close to two decades now. We have grown up, we have moved apart geographically, but I have never drifted apart. We have all gone through phases, be it the geek phase, the nerd phase, the most popular boy/girl in school phase, the cool dude phase, so on and so forth. My point here is, I acknowledge that we have all changed, but should I begin to think I was just lucky that we all changed in such a way over the time that we still remained important to one another. It would have just as likely been a case of 'drifting apart'. Or, would I be correct to claim that not everything changes?

I, for one, have not been able to start/stop loving someone as I changed. I know I have changed. Some changes I feel myself, some others around me point out. But, that has never screwed with my feelings. I still hate my first roommate. I haven't spoken to her in more than a year, and haven't met her in close to two years, but that doesn't mean one fine day I start considering her something which I didn't the day before. Ofcourse, over the time, I have changed, and I know I don't let people affect me the way they used to before. So, if I meet someone like her now, I am sure I will totally ignore that person and be indifferent.

What I am trying to say here is you can not stop feeling what you feel because you change. You might not feel the same about the same person if you met him/her today than when you originally met. You might find that person hard to deal with and make a conscious effort to move away from him/her because you have changed now. But, I can't buy the fact that the feeling just vanished one fine morning.

But then again, as the title says, we aren't the same! So, maybe this is just me, and the rest (or atleast a part) of the world works differently. 

After 18 Months

A lot has happened since I last posted. I would have been really pissed off if it hadn't since I posted last some one and a half years ago. 

I have been in Delhi for the last six months. And realized my reasons for wanting to be in Delhi were, well frankly, screwed up. I have also realized I miss Calcutta. I never thought I would, but that city sure did give me some joyous memories. I also miss fish and all things Bengali when it comes to food. Again, never thought it would be possible. I remember telling my mom over and over again how having the same cuisine for more than two decades is enough to make me never eat it again. How wrong I was! 

I do not know how much personal growth I have had. My days still seem to consist of endless hours of either watching mindless soaps or reading mindless novels. My biological clock is as bad as it was a couple of years ago. And my dedication and discipline still near negligible. 

On the bright side of things, I finally have a roommate who is awesome to live with. Someday I might write about the whack jobs I had for roommates before. I am also living in a hostel and enjoying it very much. I have made new friends. I like the new course well enough. 

I am participating in the 100 Happy Days challenge. I am in the first week of it though, and I don't know how long will I be able to be happy, since I find my default mood to be 'sad'.

One thing I do wish to continue is regular blogging. I have been tinkering with the concept of blogging for almost half a decade now and created atleast half a dozen blogs. Sadly, I haven't been able to maintain even a single for more than a few weeks. I will try to change that this time around, which is pretty much the reason I did not create a new blog for this post, considering the last post was so old and I was itching to name a new blog. Instead, I deleted all my old blogs, so that I can focus on this one.

I remember that Friends episode with all the new year resolutions and how Rachel could not keep her resolution of diary writing since 'a lot happened that year'. I really don't want to repeat that.

Hope to be back soon.

Perfect Weekends

They say happiness and sadness are relative. They also say that you are as happy or as sad as you want to be. The classic half empty-half full example comes to mind.

Similar is the case with weekends.

Your weekend can be as shitty or as amazing as you make them to be.

I have had two awesome weekends in a row. Last weekend I stayed in a city where a 7 hour power cut is common place. Not just that, the city also boasts of being a no-multiplex, no-cafe zone. But I had an awesome time last weekend.
On Saturday, I went to my favorite family friend's place. Then Rweet and I were asked to go get take-outs for the dinner. We drove around the city. Talked a lot while sipping sprite. Came back, ate a lot of food (and ice cream) and returned home after midnight.
On Sunday, which was one of best Sundays I spent in a long time, I was home with my dad for Father's day. We planted 3 saplings together, after which he took me for a driving lesson. We had a traditional Bengali lunch and a very nontraditional dinner of chicken pakora and mangoes.


That was my AWESOME WEEKEND # 1


I know of people who had the tradition "awesome weekends" last weekend!
Some went to pool parties, some went to weddings, some went to Toronto, and some even went to shopping heavens! Compared to that, my weekend was, well, umm, awesome in its own unique way.
I taught my 5 year old cousin all about wild animals, domestic animals and vegetables. I gave her a test on addition and subtraction, and she scored really well in that! My dad was visiting for a day, and I got to see him too. I met with another cousin and had a heart-to-heart with her, and made plans for the next weekend.

So, I am staying at places which hasn't even got a CCD. Haven't seen a movie in months. Yet having back to back awesome weekends.


So, I guess it is all about the perspective! :)

One Long Awaited Bicycle Ride

Last Friday I rode a bicycle after a very long time. Almost three years, I think. I used to love riding the bike. I would ride to and back from school everyday day, and sometimes would even go out in the evenings with my friends.
But then, I left town, and my cycle was given off to the gardener.

A few weeks ago, however, my mom said our neighbors might still have their daughter's cycle.
One of the first things I did after returning home was to ask the neighbor about the cycle. I took it to a friend's place and got it fixed. (It hadn't been used in quite a long time).

And so, on Friday, at about 4:45pm, I went off for a ride. The roads were deserted. There were trees on both sides of the roads. I could hear the birds chirping, and butterflies fluttering. It was simply marvelous.

And though I rode for barely 15 minutes, it still felt like heaven. It felt like old times. So many memories rushed back to me. I remember all the good times I had, at school, with friends. All the crazy times when the cycle had broken down. That one time, when I had to take a lift from a teacher to reach school after I fell from the cycle on my way.

It is strange how the little things in life hold so much meaning. And stranger still, how these very little things trigger the best of memories.

Image courtesy - people clipkart.com

Alternative Universes

ALTERNATIVE UNIVERSE # 1

You and I would be two people living in two different cities. And like most people who live in two different cities, we wouldn't know each other. Facebook would notify us having 12 mutual friends and a hell lot of common interests, but that would be all.

ALTERNATIVE UNIVERSE # 2

You and I would be two people living in the same city. You would visit my college canteen for the mutton dosa and iced tea and might see me in the passing. You and I would frequent the same joints, with our own group of friends and never know each other.

ALTERNATIVE UNIVERSE # 3

You would be the boyfriend of my best friend. I would be the best friend of your girlfriend. You and I would have heard of each other. I wouldn't remember your college name and you wouldn't remember mine. Acquaintances- that's all we would be.

OUR UNIVERSE

I know you and you know me,
A friendship forged cyberly.

I have known you for the last three years, and for more than a year now, very few days have passed when we haven't spoken. We are true blue foodies. You are sensible to the extent that I feel comfortable being my crazy self.
In our universe, this has been one hell of a friendship. In this universe, I can not begin to imagine what I would be without this friendship. Hell, we even have a dysfunctional blog together. How many people have that, right?

And, I wouldn't trade this universe with any other.