I am sad. Prfoundly sad. And this is after I have cut two birthday cakes, lunched at one of those expensive as shit places and had a great hair day. Every time I get some time to be alone since the last 9 hours, I am pensive.
I can't stop thinking back about my middle and high school afternoons. The first I did everyday after returning from school was switch on Star Movies,and keep watching whatever was on until my mom would shoo me off to either take a nap or run to the playground.
The first time I saw Mrs Doubtfire was on a summer afternoon. The movie was already halfway through by the time I had returned from school and I remember choking on my lunch (which I ate sitting crosslegged in front of the tv, because the dining table was too far) laughing at Robin Williams antics. I did not know who Robin Williams was back then. I didn't even remember seeing him in Jumanji when I was younger at the open theatre in my city's only club which showed good English movies every Tuesday (or was it Thursday?). I remember thinking Chachi 420 is such a sad rip-off (I didn't even know the word "rip-off" back then).
I remember wishing I had a cool flying robot assistant and access to some Flubber to make our Fiat fly too.(Harry and Ron hadn't taken the Flying Ford Anglia to Hogwarts yet.)
I remember cheering for Peter Pan in Hook. I had become a die hard Julia Roberts fan by then. Imagine my amazing surprise to see her as Tinker Bells during dinner one night. I remember feeling inspired by Dead Poet's Society and watching the "Oh, Captain, My Captain!" at least 20 times so far. And I remember watching The Angriest Man in Brooklyn pretty recently and thinking "he has still got it!". Little did I know that it would be his last movie to be released while he was alive.
I am not sad because a great actor and an even better comedian died today. Many great actors have passed away since I grew up enough to articulate my feeling. That is an unfortunate part of life. Heath Ledger died a few years ago, and frankly, it didn't affect me as much as Robin Williams dying today did to me. And I think the reason is that Robin Williams was a part of my childhood. I grew up laughing and crying while watching his movies. I learnt English watching his movies (we didn't have subtitles back then, thankfully!). And he died too young. In all fairness, I would probably say the same thing if he died 10 years from today, but you know what I mean.
I am sad. Profoundly. Not because Robin Williams, the actor died, but because Robin Williams, the man who made me smile when I was too young to remember Hollywood actors by their names and showed me to look at life in a whole new perspective when I was older as John Keating died this morning. And all I can do is watching Dead Poets Society again tonight and reminisce about a legend lost.